When I originally planned today’s post, it was going to be all about how to be present in your life. But truthfully, I haven’t been all that present in mine the past few months.
If you’ve been around here for a while, you know that it’s always my heart to be open and honest with you, even when it’s awkward and uncomfortable. For me, it’s important to always keep it raw and real. While I wish I could give you a checklist of things that have helped me be more present in my life… I simply can’t do that… yet! I am working on it. 🙂
This year has been quite the year. It wasn’t what I had thought it’d look like. To be fair, I don’t think any of us expected this year to be what it has been.
I gave birth to Taya at the end of February right before everything started to get crazy. I haven’t just been experiencing new motherhood… I have been experiencing new motherhood during a pandemic. A pandemic that has taken a huge hit to my mental health and my work and so much more… it’s been really hard for me. I’ve had so many breakdowns this year.
Needless to say, I have been struggling with being present, especially in the past few months. I have been longing for more for Taya’s first year. I have been caught up in my anxiety and stress. I kept adding more and more to my blog work and side hustles. I have been overwhelming myself by holding all of my prioritizes as high priorities. Uh yeah, I know… then they’re not priorities! It’s been INSANE.
Michael and I sat down this past weekend to get to the bottom of everything I’ve been struggling with. It came down to these 2 things: I haven’t been prioritizing well, and I haven’t been as present as I should be either.
It took some hard conversations and willingness to sacrifice in multiple areas for me to be able to start to feel the heaviness lift off of my shoulders. It turns out that I basically added it all to my shoulders in the first place, ha! It’s funny how that happens, huh?
Now it’s time for the hard work. It’s time for me to relearn how to prioritize and be more present in my life. I definitely don’t have it all together right now but I do have a decent “plan” of actionable steps I’m going to take in this journey to a calmer and much more intentional life. I want to share those with you.
1. DAILY MEDITATION WITH GOD – If I really want to prioritize well and be present here in the now, the first thing I need to do is rebuild a solid foundation with the Lord. I listen to my church’s Sunday sermon, sing worship songs with Taya, and pray throughout the day… but I definitely haven’t been having those intimate moments with God that my soul needs. A few weeks ago, I started using the Soulspace Christian Meditation App to help ground myself and I have been loving it. I’ve found that I can really let go and focus on the daily meditation best once I’ve put Taya to sleep for the night. The nights I’ve used Soulspace, I have truly felt peace in the moments I need it most as their meditations are grounded in the Gospel, truth, love, and peace.
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I’m making it a priority to get alone with the Lord and tune into Soulspace every night after I put Taya to sleep. I’m setting out to do this for at least a month with the intention that I can carry it out in the future. I’ll be continuing with the daily meditation and starting with the Soul Care For New Moms course.
2. SEPARATE MY TO-DO LISTS – I tend to write overwhelming daily to-do lists and that’s part of what makes up my overwhelm. I’m going to work on scaling back and creating my to-do lists with intention. I’ll be starting by focusing on creating two to-do lists for each day. The first list will be my most important tasks that need to get done. These will be my non-negotiables that have to get done before my head hits my pillow that night! The second list will be my bonus tasks. These are the tasks that would be nice if I could get them done but there’s the flexibility to carry them over.
It’s important that I don’t add goals to my to-do list because goals are not tasks. My to-do lists will be task-oriented.
3. WORK WITH THE WEATHER – As a content creator, the weather has a huge impact on my work. From the lighting to my mood, the weather affects me more than you’d think. Mike really helped me develop a realistic plan for getting work done. For example, on the days where the lighting is perfect, I’m going to focus on taking photos at-home and batching video (TikTok) content. This way I have content ready to go even on the dark gloomy days. When the weather is gloomy, I’ll focus on writing (if I’m in the mood to) and more behind-the-scenes tasks… and I’ll also nap when Taya naps!
4. LIVE FOR THE NOW – I’m learning to preach to myself that anxiety is a liar. It’s something I struggle with. Instead of dwelling on my anxiety when it arises, I want to acknowledge it and then let it go. Easier said than done, for sure. But it’s possible. If I can’t do anything about it during that moment, then I need to let it go. I need to be still. I need to live for the now… not for tomorrow. Again, easier said than done, but excited to embrace this new focus.
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I’m definitely a work in progress here and I’m okay with that. I’m feeling ready to recenter myself in properly prioritizing and being present in every moment. If you’re in a similar situation, I hope you’ll join me on this journey to a calmer and more intentional life. So much love your way!
